Why I’d suck at being a drunk (or… exactly when did I become such a freaking lightweight?)

Okay, so it wasn’t the flu I had Monday, as I told most everybody.  I was hung over.  From 2 1/2 glasses of wine. First glass went down so great, why not another?  And one more big splash ’cause we’re having a blast with our new BFFs.

I can’t drink any more.  (But can’t drink any less, ha, ha.) 

No but seriously, I’m not 24 anymore.  I guess my body can’t handle it, now that it’s such a temple of semi-fitness.

Here’s how Monday had to be re-arranged because of my hang-over…

1.  Summoned miracle strength to get The Child breakfast, pack her lunch, find her a matching outfit from a still-unfolded laundry pile, brush her hair into a ponytail, and get the booster seat out of my car for Jim to take her in his car.

2.  He drove her to school and she missed the first hour.  (She and I usually leave home at 7:40, Jim an hour later.) 

3.  I almost vomited, wished I had.  I almost passed out on the toilet.

4.  I revived from #3, thank fuck.

5.  I slept 4 hours.

6.  Woke with a pounding headache, but a cup of coffee took care of that.

7.  I drank water.

8.  I drank enriched Soymilk.

9.  I arranged for another mom to pick The Child up, plus a two-hour playdate at the other child’s house after, and have them drop mine back home.  Nice friends!

10. Felt well enough to recline in bed with computer and post that Nee Von Vandervester thing.

11. Went back to sleep until The Child came home.

12.  We missed her Kung Fu class.  (I caused her to miss it.)

13.  And I missed my run that morning.

14.  Plus, I missed the Halloween Carnival committee update meeting that morning.

15.  And I didn’t work on my musical at all. 

A whole day wasted.  Over 2 1/2 glasses of wine!  Never again.

I don’t really drink much (except for Sunday night, Lord fuck.)  I love a margarita now and then.  Love a white Russian.  A cold bottled beer or two on a hot day.   I can have a glass of wine with dinner a few times a week, or not, and leave it at that.   But due to our family’s upset Monday because of me being slightly alcohol poisoned, I can imagine how a real alcoholic would wreak havoc like that practically every day and how utterly terribly sad it must be for those families.  For the kids.

I’d suck at being an drunk because I’ve got ‘way too much going on in my life.