As some of you know, I suffered a bizarre knitting accident a few years ago which left me unable to do memes and housework. But today… Right Now… I will push my outer limits to honor Mama Zen and her gracious meme challenge, tho it means as soon as I post I’ll have to close all the blinds, lie down with cool packs on my eyes and listen to Sounds of Happy Oceans while sipping asparagus tea.
So… “Ten Honest Things About Me” (as opposed to my usual falsified crap.)
1. I once hid the above “It’s Haunted” book for a week when Kelly was two. Just couldn’t hack one single second more of it. Sorry.
2. I used to pretend I was Joni Mitchell.
3. I used to pretend Bob Dylan loved me.
4. Sometimes I pretend I’m taping a cooking show as I prepare dinner. And I’m pretty good, I think, with my witty repartee and attention to dicing and slicing detail, even tho I’m alone and no cameras are actually rolling.
5. To paraphrase how I responded to Stacey‘s guest post on Barbara‘s blog last week, I dream of a future where little children run with joyful abandon through the streets shouting “Jannie Funster! Jannie Funster!”
6. When I run I keep my car key and a Chapstick in my bra.
7. I always cry when I hear Iz’s “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” on my car radio. If you haven’t heard it, here it is. I recommend closing your eyes to listen. [But as Lance pointed out, probably best not to close eyes if it’s playing while you’re driving]
8. On our two-week vacation to Canada this past summer I didn’t eat a single green salad the entire time, substituting that fare for two a day of the pastries and candy bars of my childhood, below.
(I totally recommend freezing both a la Thelma in “Thelma and Louise” before munching. OMG. And I don’t recommend lack of greens as a regular dietary habit.)
9. I forget why Earth’s core is so hot and molten.
10. When I almost passed out a couple of months ago I was sure I was dying or suffering a brain stem aneurism that would leave me forever locked-in. But it passed. And here I am, a Big Bad Meme Breaker who will not pass this on as such, but will invite you to share “An Honest Thing” or more about you, if you feel so inclined. Thanks.
Now, to that asparagus tea.
[See! See what a bad memer I am — I didn’t even tag anyone as Caity suggested. I’m just awful and now nobody on the internets will ever want anything to do with me ever again. I’m finished. Washed up. A has-been before I ever really was. Well, it was fun while it lasted.]
