Yes, Kids Do Say The Darndest Things — 3

(These are all from her current age eight.)

1.
She: Actually, I don’t mind you spilled a little paint on my floor, Mom. It gives my room that real artisty feel.

2. [Overheard to one her friends] She: My dad is so smart and awesome to own his own business, because he can never get fired!

3.
Me: [when she wasn’t quite grasping why we have mayors and governors, as well as a president] I’ll explain it again when you’re a little older.
[ten seconds elapse.]
She: I’m older now — explain it!

4.
Me: [trying to get her to count her blessings] Be happy! Today is the first day of the rest of your life!
She: What!?!? Today is the last day of my life?
Me: No! I said today if the first day of the rest of your life.
She: Ohhh. I thought you said it was the LAST day of my life, and I’m going to die today.
[Thoughtful Pause]
Me: Well… we never know when we’re going to die, do we? We could go any minute.
She: But I probably won’t die today because I eat right, exercise and get lots of sleep!

5.
She: [After feasting on prime rib] Oh, I could NOT eat another single bite. But I do have room for dessert! [Okay, who can relate to that?] 🙂

6.
Me: What should we do about your budding computer addiction?
She: Let me have more computer time?

7.
She: Why do they make underwear all fancy when it only gets covered up anyway?!?

8.
She: My hands are freaking cold, Mom
Me: I told you I don’t like you saying that word.
She: What?? I’m EIGHT years old.  All my friends say “freaking.”
Me: Well, I don’t think it’s appropriate. You should be saying something like… my hands are really cold.
She: Okay — my hands are REALLY freaking cold.

9.
Me: Mr. Natural — I wonder if that’s a good place to eat?  I’ve passed by it a thousand times but I’ve never darkened the door.
She: Why would you do that? The door looks perfectly fine to me.

10.
She: How did I ever survive all these years without this awesome laptop!?!?! [one she got a few weeks ago]

Hey, if you’re new here, you might get a kick out of my kid’s previous Art Linkletter Loments, edition one and edition two.

xoxo

A Right Texas-Friendly Blog, Some Say

(photo: summer, 2007)

All y’all are so darned tootin’ sweet!!

A few weeks back when I asked why y’all might recommend newcomers to subscribe to my blog, y’all came through with more beautifully touching words than I could’ve ever imagined in a whole lifetime of chasing hogs, ropin’ wild turkeys and jumpin’ nekkid into the cement-pond at night. 

THANK Y’ALL SO MUCH!!

I’ve incorporated y’all’s ideas I feel best reflect this blog into my new 18 Reasons To Love This Blog page, linked up for all perpetuity. And such.

Now, I know toutin’ my own blog could seem I have Texas-sized ego. But friends… like Mama done told me in the carrot patch when I was seven — “Jannie Junebug, you give the world your very best, and you’ll always be on your own sunshiney path to glory.” And Mama knows some stuff! Lots of stuff!!  Like how to blanch string beans, spot rhubarb at 200 paces, and field-dress a moose in a blizzard make her own cheddar.

So, thank all y’all, again. I love all y’all so much!

Thanks also for bearin’ with my blog construction dust as I further whip my design into shape.  I’ve gone as far as I can on my own, makin’ and puttin’ in my new nav buttons. Next I have to git with my WordPress Consultant Guru to pull my search button down yonder, and get rid of the top nav bar altogether.  Wish me luck, sweet Peeps — a design vision came to me in the night, and I daren’t rest until I lay that sucker to bed.

HAPPY EASTER, y’all — it seems we reached our goal of 500 blogs participating in the Hershey’s baskets!! Woo-hoo!!!

And lastly — a question… have you ever been to Texas?  If so, what did you like about it?  And if you’ve not yet been… what in tarnation is keepin’ ya, and what would you like to see and do in Texas?

xoxoxoxoxo, and such.

Let’s Spread Some Easter Miracle Love, Baby!!

(Kelly’s First Easter, 2002, age 7 months)

So, here’s something extra-super cool!! Hershey’s is donating $10 to the Children’s Miracle Network for every blog participating in their BETTER BASKET BLOG HOP.  Shakira gifted me with a basket.

All you have to do is…

* Copy and paste these rules to your blog post.
* Create a blog post giving a virtual Easter Basket to another blogger – you can give as many Virtual Baskets as you want.
* Link back to person who gave you an Easter Basket.
* Let each person you are giving a Virtual Easter Basket know you have given them a Basket.
* Leave your link at BetterBasket.info/BlogHop comment section. You can also find the official rules of this Better Basket Blog Hop, and more information about Better Basket with Hershey’s there.
* Hershey’s is donating $10 per each blog participating to the Better Basket Blog Hop to Children’s Miracle Network (up to total of $5,000 by blog posts written by April 4th, 2010).
* Please note that only one blog post by each blog url will count towards the donation.

As The Zen Of Motherhood (and to quote her verbatim,) “I’m tagging you ALL — let’s raise some money for the kids!”

Just put up your post by midnight, Eastern Time on April 4th. (April 4th — which just happens to be this Jannie’s birthday!!)   🙂

And thank you, Hersheys!!

xo

Too Much Tequila — I’ll Say!!

image credit: photobucket

Below are real searches that real humans actually typed to land on this site, from this past Nov. through Feb. I read them in my Google Analytics, THE awesomest website stats (free) service on the planet.

GENERALLY BIZARRE & REALLY BIZARRE…
— squirrels in bikinis
— fun things to do with hand sanitizer
— shirley temple bowling balls
— smiley the chainsaw man
— 50 things to do weird
— 3 legged goat
— riding a grocery cart poem
— pain-in-the-butt coworker poem
— why did orgo think his pants were too short
— a picture of a fish holding a beer bottle
— poems that are actually good instead of the crappy poems that usually come up when i press search
— fun things to do to strangers
— picture of ugly man in sink
— naked man in kitchen sink

UNDERGARMENTS …
— are girdles making a comeback
— bra joy
— tara’s miracle girdles
— how to make a bra for a goat

THE JANNIE CATEGORY…
— country jannie
— jannie weather reporter
— jannie madman
— jannie who sings at night in hawaii (Okay, okay — i just made this one up. “naked jannie” was the actual search, but I’m far too shy to ever reveal that.) 🙂

WITH  COMMENTARY…
— i cant wait to try out my new-found hypnotic powers on my neighbor (good luck with that!  and how did that go, anyway??)
— jannie goes to jail photo (No! They swore those negatives were all destroyed! Destroyed, I tell you!!)
— peeing your pants and heroin use (gee, I do pee mine on occasion, but I never touch the hard stuff.)
— i love my jannie (ahhh, thanks, — i love YOU too — whoever you are!)
— videos of kids chanting 13, then with 14 — a poke in the eye (ouch!)
— why is my wife the only one who makes me crazy (dude! that’s the post-Eden cosmic plan! yet, a new Eden does await, even at this moment if you so allow.)
— my area rug smells like hay (yeah, don’t you just love that wonderful aroma!!?)
— sorta long sweet things to say to a girl — (ahhh, that’s niiiice!)
— awesome buttocks (you know — some days I do catch a glimpse of mine in the mirror and I think “not bad.  not bad at all.”  must be all this cross-legged sitting at the computer, those 20-minute walks twice a week, and sucking in my gut twice a month.) 😉
–too much tequila, too little sunscreen (yeah, like i said up in the title…)

MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE…!
— hello person reading these searches. i see you! — (i see YOU TOO!!!)

Sweet readers, I hope some of these made you chuckle!  🙂

And if you are new here and fancy more of these weird searches, they start here, back before I had my ludicrous-big photos.  🙂

Thanks, Sweeties!!  I’ll be posting again in the next coupla days, so y’all come back now, ya hear!!?

xoxo

Spring Camping On The Texas Pedernales

Here are a few photos I took this past weekend on Kelly’s semi-annual school camping trip.  (I took over 100. Only subjecting you to 14.) (Today.)   🙂  (edit: I took over 100 photos — not 100 kids, as per funny/smart Hilary‘s amused observation.) At least that’s what I think she meant by “100 little wonders.”)  ?   🙂

The next one I call Sunday Morning Bleary.  Kelly had about 3 hours sleep Saturday night.  And maybe 6 hours Friday. ‘Twas a wild and wonderful time for all.

Camp sweet home. My tent!

Kelly has her own little tent she shares with a friend or two.

She does show up for food and drink occasionally at my site.  🙂

Notice the half-gallon of hand sanitizer on my table. I told you I’m OCD with that stuff, right?

Jim never stays for the night (boo-hoo) but he does come for the Saturday potluck dinner followed by the sing-along — so that’s better than nothing!

My favorite part of camping — the coffee bacon mornings!  Pancakes too!  ‘Cept I didn’t photograph the pancakes.  🙂

But I did photograph Kelly up a tree Friday night!

(Don’t worry, don’t worry — all the kids climb that.  She just happened to be the only one up there at the moment.)

Okay so, just when you thought you’d seen it all — I tell you a river is about a 3-minute walk down the path from the tenting area.

And I show you yet more pics — of river stuff.

A second edit: because I can, and because there were no words between these two pictures…  🙂

The nights were cold, maybe around 45-50?F (9C) and the days were about 78F (24C.)

There, all better with this post now.    🙂

On you go!

But wait!  There were no words between these pix either!

Ahh, much better now.

And more words here.  The water was about 55F (12C)  Brrrrr!!

Yes — someone took a picture of ME too! I did!! A little shadow dancing with myself.

Anyhoo, Jim has bought a tiramisu cake from Whole Foods! And I think I shall post this and go see if I can offer him any assistance with the window he’s putting in.  Then get Miss Sweetie Camper off the computer and into the bath. And to an early bed. Oh yeah.  School again tomorrow!

Toodles, sweeties!

(Look, my shoe!)

Off I go.
xoxo
🙂

(Yes, all these are iPhone pix, in case any of your enquiring minds were wondering.)

Another little edit:  What’s nice about this school trip is the parents bring their kids, so it’s not like I was in a chaperone situation over a bunch of kids.  A real family outing!

And I did drink 3 beers.  Well, 2.75 total. I petered out on my Friday night one.  But made up for it Saturday with those two whole Sierra Nevada Pale Ales!  And had a couple ounces of wine that night too.  DECADENT JANNIE!! 🙂