Her first broken arm happened when she was 18 months old. (No post on that yet.)
But I digress.
Already.
Getting back to this afternoon… (I mean yesterday afternoon,) I was at a coffeeshop slogging away having fun writing a song when I got the call that Kelly had just bounced clear off the birthday party bouncy house onto her arm. Poor baby.
Ten minutes and one morphine shot later, Kelly and I were running all kinds of red lights in a cute little bus with sirens and flashing lights.
Morphine for ME? I wish.
She took the attendant’s cue and smiled along for a parting shot as we landed at the wonderful wonderful Dell Childrens’ Hospital.
A flurry of loving attendants swooped upon us.
“You’ll need an i.v., honey. And more morphine.” Why not?
Morphine for Mom? Not a freakin’ chance!
Next photo — NOT for the faint of heart. So rush on past, if you must.
Nope — NOT good. Both the ulna and that other bone — what the heck is it called? Tibia? Fibia? Patella? Rotini? Fuselli? Funnybone? Nope. Oh, what IS it?? Oh, yeah, the RADIUS! Funny name for a bone that’s actually not round. I think. Maybe I missed that day in my orthopedic surgeon’s class.
But anyway.
She’d broken ’em both real nice. But luckily, not completely off — just kind of hanging together.
And some sleepy meds, and off to la-la land goes Kelly.
Luckily, she didn’t have to go to O.R. — they wheeled in all kinds of fancy machines and were able to “reconstitute” (or whatever term they used) her bones right there in her little E.R. room.
Jim and I were kindly asked to “step outside” for said reconstitution.
But we came back to see this…
Ahh, much better! Nice straight arm again.
Then were asked to “step outside” again when the firetruck x-ray machine came in.
I wanted the palm tree x-ray machine, but they were fresh out.
Back in we went.
Looking much MUCH better than her twisted “swan” wrist manoeuvre of above.
Then… they took a saw to my baby’s arm!!! Well, just a vibrating one. And just to the cast, to loosen it to allow for swelling. But still — I hate when they do the saw thing. I’ve been through it 3 times now, and it never gets any more pleasant.
Then… they brought out the blue swiss cheese elevation thing. I’d’ve preferred gorgonzola, but broken armed beggars can’t be choosers.
Wakey-wakey, Baby. And drink your blue Powerade, so you we all can go home.
Wake up, Sweetie!
Oh well. At least there’s Fox News to help bide the time.
Her feet are getting HUMONGOUS!! When did that happen!?
Then there was puking. (I was a little tied-up to catch those action shots, sorry.)
She woke, drank the blue Powerade, rested 10 minutes and puked. A lot of blue Powerade puking. All over. And on my jeans, socks and shoes.
But — into each life a little puke must volatiley project. Shakespeare said that, right?
Bedding changed, floor mopped, the Kelly snoozed a bit more.
Hey, that blue thing makes a great pillow!! She only has to have it on 2 days, then can sling it.
It’s ‘way after midnight as I post this. Heck! It’s way after 1:00 a.m.!
She’s sleeping here beside me, yes in the blue cheese thing.. And she’s okay. My baby is fine. No Kung Fu or gymnastics for 6 weeks or so. But plenty of cuddles, movies, books, who knows what else and such, will transpire.
I have drunk 2 glasses of wine as I uploaded these pics and wrote this. And eaten popcorn. Nice dinner!
And my baby is whole and healing.
All is well.
But should we give serious thought to — as Jim points out in the short video below — “take out a membership in the hospital” as in a Frequent Arm Breaker Program??
Part Two of our beautiful Zilker Gardens can be found here.
Does your area have a public garden? Do you go there with your camera? Or pen and paper? Or with nothing at all, but you and your heart and soul to be filled?
1. She: Actually, I don’t mind you spilled a little paint on my floor, Mom. It gives my room that real artisty feel.
2. [Overheard to one her friends] She: My dad is so smart and awesome to own his own business, because he can never get fired!
3. Me: [when she wasn’t quite grasping why we have mayors and governors, as well as a president] I’ll explain it again when you’re a little older.
[ten seconds elapse.] She: I’m older now — explain it!
4. Me: [trying to get her to count her blessings] Be happy! Today is the first day of the rest of your life! She: What!?!? Today is the last day of my life? Me: No! I said today if the first day of the rest of your life. She: Ohhh. I thought you said it was the LAST day of my life, and I’m going to die today.
[Thoughtful Pause] Me: Well… we never know when we’re going to die, do we? We could go any minute. She: But I probably won’t die today because I eat right, exercise and get lots of sleep!
5. She: [After feasting on prime rib] Oh, I could NOT eat another single bite. But I do have room for dessert! [Okay, who can relate to that?] 🙂
6. Me: What should we do about your budding computer addiction? She: Let me have more computer time?
7. She: Why do they make underwear all fancy when it only gets covered up anyway?!?
8. She: My hands are freaking cold, Mom Me:I told you I don’t like you saying that word. She: What?? I’m EIGHT years old. All my friends say “freaking.” Me: Well, I don’t think it’s appropriate. You should be saying something like… my hands are really cold.
She: Okay — my hands are REALLY freaking cold.
9. Me:Mr. Natural — I wonder if that’s a good place to eat? I’ve passed by it a thousand times but I’ve never darkened the door. She: Why would you do that? The door looks perfectly fine to me.
10. She: How did I ever survive all these years without this awesome laptop!?!?! [one she got a few weeks ago]
Hey, if you’re new here, you might get a kick out of my kid’s previous Art Linkletter Loments, edition one and edition two.
