Austin Rain of Terror

OMG, we woke to funny-looking white stuff on our palms this morning! 

Palm TREES, that is.  

Here, I’ll let Wade Porter tell you all about it, he does a far better job than I could’ve hoped to.  [In his “Old Man Winter holds City of Austin in Icy Grip” post] lol writing!

Ten Honest Things

As some of you know, I suffered a bizarre knitting accident a few years ago which left me unable to do memes and housework.  But today…  Right Now…  I will push my outer limits to honor Mama Zen and her gracious meme challenge, tho it means as soon as I post I’ll have to close all the blinds, lie down with cool packs on my eyes and listen to Sounds of Happy Oceans while sipping asparagus tea.

So…  “Ten Honest Things About Me” (as opposed to my usual falsified crap.)

1.   I once hid the above “It’s Haunted” book for a week when Kelly was two.  Just couldn’t hack one single second more of it.  Sorry.

2.  I used to pretend I was Joni Mitchell.

3.  I used to pretend Bob Dylan loved me.

4.  Sometimes I pretend I’m taping a cooking show as I prepare dinner.  And I’m pretty good, I think, with my witty repartee and attention to dicing and slicing detail, even tho I’m alone and no cameras are actually rolling.

5.  To paraphrase how I responded to Stacey‘s guest post on Barbara‘s blog last week, I dream of a future where little children run with joyful abandon through the streets shouting “Jannie Funster!  Jannie Funster!”

6.  When I run I keep my car key and a Chapstick in my bra.

7.  I always cry when I hear Iz’s “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” on my car radio.  If you haven’t heard it, here it is.  I recommend closing your eyes to listen. [But as Lance pointed out, probably best not to close eyes if it’s playing while you’re driving]

8. On our two-week vacation to Canada this past summer I didn’t eat a single green salad the entire time,  substituting that fare for two a day of the pastries and candy bars of my childhood, below.

(I totally recommend freezing both a la Thelma in “Thelma and Louise” before munching.  OMG.  And I don’t recommend lack of greens as a regular dietary habit.)

9.  I forget why Earth’s core is so hot and molten.

10.    When I almost passed out a couple of months ago I was sure I was dying or suffering a brain stem aneurism that would leave me forever locked-in.  But it passed.  And here I am, a Big Bad Meme Breaker who will not pass this on as such, but will invite you to share “An Honest Thing” or more about you, if you feel so inclined.  Thanks.

Now, to that asparagus tea.

[See!  See what a bad memer I am — I didn’t even tag anyone as Caity suggested.  I’m just awful and now nobody on the internets will ever want anything to do with me ever again.  I’m finished.  Washed up.  A has-been before I ever really was.  Well, it was fun while it lasted.]

Doris to register nine

What if I told you there was a world where  “leaves the color of toffee lipstick settle on the surface of small bodies of water like recaptured kisses,

where you wrap the morning around you like a robe of silken mist,

where poems wash up in drifts on the furniture,

where depressed demons drown their sorrows in chocolate cake at Denny’s,

robots fall in love with curling irons,

and even the Marlboro Man eventually trades in his old black skillet for a dream kitchen and a yard in the ‘burbs?”

Wouldn’t you want to get lost in that world?

And often?  

I do!   And I more than highly recommend it. 

Update:  those lines above within the quotes are all from Shay’s poems, just so y’all don’t get to thinking I’m suddenly brilliant. 🙂  Even “Doris to register nine,” is hers, which I think is a freaking wonderful line, maybe even a title for a song.

Endometriosis sucks

My sister and cousin never knew that the cold and windy fall day nine years ago I went out alone “for fresh air” in the fields behind the barn (if they remember at all,) it wasn’t really allergies making my eyes so red when I returned.  It was from bawling them out while I was gone because there they were with their beautiful babies and their talk of whose angel was starting to hold her head up and whose was starting to take steps alone and hold a spoon by himself.  And there was I after my 3rd miscarriage and various procedures to correct my uterus and try to repair the damage to my pelvis done by endometriosis, damage I didn’t even know I had until my infertility heartbreak began.   

Endometriosis sucks.  It’s painful often to the point of curled-up-in-bed-fetally debilitation.  It can mess with fertility.  Mess with life.  And all too often is marginalized or dismissed by doctors.  And mostly misunderstood and incorrectly covered in the media.

BUT… my pal Jeanne at her Endo Blog is spearheading a petition you can sign (takes 2 MINS OR LESS TO FILL OUT) to spread awareness and FACTS about endometriosis.  She’s submitting it with a letter to Oprah and The View.  So please help if you can.  Every signature counts!  

Funky Folky Fab & Fun

Sure, we could go ’round and ’round forever on whether I was really the axe wielding nut and she in need of the restraining order, or vice versa but that’s all water under the bridge now, right?  All mended bones, patched eyeballs and such.  What really matters is you’re probably gonna fall in love too with the art and spirit of Miss Renee “Stinky Swanson” Ragtree of Funky and Folky Sculpture !

Her carolers above are one-offs conceived, designed and hand-crafted by this gal who not only continually leaves me in awe of her creative art but keeps me laughing with her blog’s kooky commentary. 

Plus, anyone with bangs as freakish as mine has to be a new BFF, right?